Wednesday, January 20, 2010


In one of my former lives I was a court reporter...mostly personal injury deposition work. When someone is involved in an accident, they're asked to describe what happened in as few words as possible on the insurance accident form. The following quotes were taken from these forms and were eventually published in the Toronto Sun newspaper:

"The pedestrian hit me and went under my car."

"In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."

"I had been driving in my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident."

"I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him."

"The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him."

"I saw the slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car."

"The telephone pole was approaching fast and I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions."

"I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."

"The guy was all over the road; I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."

"Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment."

And my favorite:  "An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished."

I hate it when that happens!

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